&yet

by Sophie Mayer

wet
& yet

this one timeflood

the chest wall cracks
open: waterfall heart
full & a hot pink air

*

or what I am trying to say is

*

all the ways

my

cunt/body/heart/blood/sensorium

feels

towards/in/through/for/of/at

apprehending

world/you/self/us/possibility/desire

o my all

is the way // the way is all

WALLWALLWALL

*

it’s only a few words from keraia horn(y) to
                                                          keragnumi all mixed up
                                                                                       poured out

*

feeling: apprehensive

               to feel = to apprehend
               in the one timeflood
               flash memories of how
               this was wrong & this
               & can it be right now

fuckfuckfuck / a grammar
of sex & errancy

a curseblessing    killcure

sip at

*

there’s this thing with prepositions

there is nothing more wistful than these bits of language that solidify all our raw hopes of relation

wistful:
from whisht not wis nor wit

which vectored silence cannot
hold knowing // cannot but hold
the timeflood, the one & one & one

it happened to
it happened for
it happened with
it happened by
it happened under

raw.ow.

*

&yetbutstill

& yet: verb, to pour, to melt metal, pour out, flow

I fucking love (for other cognates,
see gush) the dictionary
f/lick it to get
(gut)

yet/ymology: Old Norse gjóta only in senses, to drop one’s young, twinkle with the eyes

I twinkle with the alternative
with happening (&-ing (in general)

we are all dropped when young
one way or another dropped into
world &still here most days

so slide on that, pageturn for
the one timeflood is //stacking//

a ‘vertical’ investigation … concerned, in a sense, not with what is occurring, but with what it feels like

what it feels to
like & beliked
to be like to be

concerned with
to concern to
occur // happen

a happiness
               that hot
a happiness
               pink air

(With some words by Anne Carson and Maya Deren, italicised)

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